Forgiveness
You have heard me say many times that human beings do not have the capacity to forgive. Forgiveness is nothing that a human can conjure up, but when it shows up, there can be no mistake as to what it is.
The type of forgiveness that some people say they are capable of creating is only lip service compared to real forgiveness. Real forgiveness is not a thought. It’s a sensation – one that we label afterwards with a thought. People who are trying to forgive are stuck in their head and points further south. There is no trying necessary. Forgiveness will show up when it shows up – like the family member who’s always late.
You can open the door to forgiveness by recognizing that you are trying to do the impossible – to consciously forgive. Aside: When I think of impossible, I think of a nun I had in the 6th grade who likened spreading rumors to opening up a feather pillow in a wind storm. If the rumor you passed along was untrue, it would be impossible to recapture all the feathers and who they touched.
I think that we can create a pathway for forgiveness to walk on by being willing to recognize the humanness of those who have hurt us. This recognition may never excuse their actions or behavior yet it may clear some space for forgiveness to take a few steps in our direction.
The ego and its position of justification will keep forgiveness at a standstill, always being held at bay.
What the ego knows, but doesn’t want us to know, is that forgiveness sets aside all the rationalizations the ego feeds on to keep our bitterness in place, and fills us with a deep sense of peace and completion. Forgiveness rearranges priorities and creates compassion.
Talking about forgiveness is like talking about being in love. You can use all the flowery words you can think of to describe it, but your audience will never know what you mean until they feel it.
Feeling forgiveness is indescribably peaceful. It’s a knowing that trumps all facts and figures. When forgiveness arrives, you naturally want to bestow it upon others. That action creates a flow that keeps a constant stream of forgiveness in our hearts with plenty to go around.
Colin Tipping in his book Radical Forgiveness says that a willingness to forgive is the first step. This is not conscious forgiveness but a willingness to be open to something new instead of being closed off by something you know.
I’ll leave this topic with this thought. If you want someone to come to your party, be willing to send them an invitation.
All the best,
John
http://cdbaby.com/cd/johnmorgan
http://www.cafepress.com/grasshoppernote/3580301
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