It seems like something Captain Obvious would say but holding on prevents us from letting go.

What prevents us from releasing our grasp? One answer I come up with is this: Holding on to the past proves it existed. What that means to me is that we are so defined by back then, that we refuse to let it go because if we do, we believe we won’t exist.

It’s truly limiting to be defined by the roles we play in life. We are so much more but we can’t find that depth by having a death grip on the memory of who we once were.

I’m not sure I have a strategy for outgrowing the past, only the realization that the past isn’t happening now.

What is going on now is your life – not what you had then or what you will have in the future, but, rather, what you have now.

Focusing on what you have now is a springboard to letting go. Holding on is holding on to an illusion – something that doesn’t exist now.

To have the past go out of focus, we have to be present to the present. It’s really the only time that exists. Now is a reality; then is a memory and the future is a fantasy.

Here’s something worth holding on to: You aren’t the roles you play, only the spirit that can create a brand new day.

All the best,

John

This probably never happened to you but I’ve made the same stupid mistake more than once.

It’s like I was trapped in a revolving door with no exit.

The only remedy for me was to evolve. That meant recognizing I was in a circular loop.

Did you ever notice that most of your thinking is circular? To use the modern day vernacular, you “circle back” to that which didn’t work the last time.

I think we all can learn a lesson from Thomas Edison. Yes, he made lots of mistakes but not the same ones. He had the presence of mind to recognize what didn’t work and mapped out another route. That’s evolving.

One of our greatest but least used assets is our ability to notice. Noticing is the key to keep the door from revolving around the same real estate.

Notice what you’re thinking while you’re thinking it and you interrupt the revolving thought loop. It’s this interruption at the time of crime that puts you on the pathway to change.

You can be a prisoner of your thoughts and experience the recidivism that goes along with that or you can notice and be set free.

Let me circle back to the title of this post: Revolve or Evolve? One takes you for a spin; the other drives you where you want to go.

All the best,

John

I’ve lived most of my adult life as an iconoclast. The downside of that approach is isolation. That means when you question or expose someone’s sacred cow, you are shunned by many.

This is not a rant that it shouldn’t be that way. It just is.

I can attest that when you travel a lonesome road, there aren’t many welcoming Inns on your journey.

If you’re being contrary on purpose, that’s not iconoclasm, that’s just being a dick.

If your iconoclasm is authentic, you will have a plethora of facts to back you up. If you’re just a blowhard, your positions will be blown away by the lightest of winds.

Iconoclasts don’t have a union. in fact, most of them are independent operators, not joiners. Some would consider them lonely, and some are. Others are so comfortable in their own skin that being on their own is a freedom that few people will ever enjoy. I’m reminded of what The Grasshopper offered many moons ago: “Alone is a fact; lonely is a state of mind.”

I readily agree with the English poet John Donne that “No man is an island.” Other people are essential to our growth and existence, but rarely the ones who worship glossy facades and fake gods. Sad to report that I find they are the overwhelming majority, which leaves iconoclasts in small company.

If you bury your iconoclasm, you are part of the walking dead. It needs to be expressed or it will eat you from the inside out.

Speak up if it’s from the heart and has legs to stand on. Not doing so will leave you alone with your thoughts which keeps you isolated from your creativity.

Just a recommendation to my non-iconoclastic friends. Going along to get along is truly a lonely existence.

All the best,

John

The short answer is to protect us. You may ask, “from what?” The answer: from the consequences of our actions.

If you willy-nilly open your car door and ding another car, what is one of your very first reactions? You may comment to yourself how stupid you are for not looking or you may blame the other person for parking too close. But it’s the next reaction that has us seek to escape the consequences. That conditioned reaction is to quickly look around to see if anyone saw us.

If you drive away after deducing that no one witnessed your act, you deny you are responsible, which is a lie.

When you see someone lie as easily as they breathe, you know they have something to hide. They are not willing to pay the consequences for their behavior.

One of the 5 signs of immaturity I have written about is the failure to take responsibility. The inveterate liar refuses to account for their actions. That not only makes them immature, it makes them unreliable – not someone you can count on.

If you want to be treated as an adult, stop lying and start accounting. If you continue to deny, your life is a lie, and no one can protect you from the weight of your fate.

All the best,

John