GrasshopperNotes.com - Thoughts for inspired living


December 1, 2021

Stuck To Your Story

Filed under: Uncategorized — John Morgan @ 5:17 am

Bubble gum ge8df46705 1920The Grasshopper offered this piece of adhesive input the other day: “You can’t help anyone stuck to their story.”

Your story, my story, is a history lesson of how you got to where you are. It’s not a roadmap that will take you in a new direction. In fact, it only goes in one direction: backwards!

I feel sorry for therapists. They listen to peoples’ stories every day. It’s the same story the client has told to countless people, countless times. The hope is that telling it again will provide relief and a direction forward if only they can find the right person to tell it to.

Sorry to dash your hopes but your story doesn’t provide answers, only justifications for keeping you stuck. Your therapist, friend, clergy member, bartender only needs to hear your story once. This shows them where you’re stuck. It’s now their challenge to get you to recognize that telling that tale again is a waste of both of your times. Then it’s time to work on a plan to get you moving in the direction you need to go: forward!

It’s my experience that people are obsessed with telling you how they got to where they are. Their story is populated with other people who are the cause of their current location. That may well be true, but continuing to tell your tale acts as glue, keeping you stuck to your story.

Continually focusing on how you got here delays moving forward. Consider this. Pretend that you arrived at a desolate destination by car. The car is now gone. How is prattling on about how you arrived helpful in getting you out of there? It’s not, and never will be.

It’s time to notice where you currently are, set a goal to where you want to go, and then start building a bridge from here to there.

The story you do want to tell is how you got back on your feet. You can only tell that one by removing the glue from your shoe.

People are tired of hearing your story, even those close to you. If it was helpful in moving you forward, I would encourage you to go on an international speaking tour and tell the whole world. But it’s not. It’s a governor on your progress.

The more time you spend telling your account of why and how, the less time you spend in the only time you can craft your future: Now!

All the best,

John



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November 29, 2021

Unfinished Business

Filed under: Uncategorized — John Morgan @ 3:50 pm

Sink g31495a102 1280Washing dishes one morning, The Grasshopper chimed in with this: “I don’t like starting my day cleaning up from yesterday.”

I think it was more than a household hint from Heloise. It got me wondering about all the things I abandon that will still be there tomorrow.

The Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu reminded us: Do the difficult things while they are easy and do the great things while they are small.

It’s predictive that what’s left for another day will make us pay.

This isn’t a message about getting more things done. It’s more about what’s left undone.

Unfinished business follows you around like a salesperson in a furniture store. It has staying power.

What’s left unfinished is cumulative. That means it adds more to your burden each day you delay.

We all have some unfinished business that needs cleaning up. The main reason we avoid it is the perceived pain of ripping off the band-aide. Rarely do we consider the mental strain that piles up every day by not airing out the wound.

Unfinished business is like borrowing money from a loan shark. The longer we take in paying it back, not only makes it more expensive, but it can take years off our life.

Going forward, the recommendation is don’t start anything you can’t finish. But if you’ve already begun, it will be your undoing if you leave it undone.

All the best,

John



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November 28, 2021

Chance Meetings – Recorded Version

Filed under: John Morgan's Blog — John Morgan @ 8:08 am

Here is the recorded version of the Grasshopper Note for the week of 11-29-21.

Read the written version here.

Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.



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November 21, 2021

Texture – Recorded Version

Filed under: John Morgan's Blog — John Morgan @ 6:11 pm

Here is the recorded version of the Grasshopper Note for the week of 11-22-21.

Read the written version here.

Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.



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November 17, 2021

I Met Kismet

Filed under: Uncategorized — John Morgan @ 5:06 am

Woman g83590139c 1280Fate, destiny, karma, are just a few words we use to describe Kismet.

They seem to connote some sort of predestination. That means it was always going to turn out this way no matter what you did.

Just like when Napoleon faced his Waterloo, some say, “He met his Kismet.”

I believe many outcomes can be predicted by one’s behavior. What I don’t believe is that they were predestined when we were but a twinkle in our father’s eye.

I’ve met Kismet on too many occasions to remember, but my definition of the word is different. I met reality.

It seems when we don’t like the reality that appears in our life, we, too often, negate any responsibility for it by assigning it to “God’s will” or some other synonym that shifts the blame.

When we divorce ourselves from our realities, we just set them up to happen again.

If you’ve ever said, “Why does this always happen to me?” you’re in denial about the part you played. Think of the person who attracts the same kind of people into their life. It’s not Kismet that they hook up with another narcissist, drunk, philanderer, or abusive person. It’s a reality they had a hand in.

Do some introspection and answer the question: “What is it in my behavior that’s attracting the same kind of people into my life? What you’ll discover is, that it wasn’t written in the stars, but inscribed on a sign that you wear around your neck. It reads, “Kick me.”

This discovery begins when you start taking some responsibility for what happens in your life. If you keep assigning it to “out there somewhere,” prepare to enter the revolving door of Kismet.

Two of my favorite philosophies are:

1. If you always do what you always did, you’ll always get what you always got.

2. Teach people how to treat you from the start.

Want to change your lot? Do the things many others will not: Look for and adjust your part in this play and you won’t fall victim to a predetermined plot.

All the best,

John



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November 14, 2021

Blinded By Beliefs – Recorded Version

Filed under: John Morgan's Blog — John Morgan @ 7:34 am

Here is the recorded version of the Grasshopper Note for the week of 11-15-21.

Read the written version here.

Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.



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November 7, 2021

Who Are You? – Recorded Version

Filed under: John Morgan's Blog — John Morgan @ 8:14 pm

Here is the recorded version of the Grasshopper Note for the week of 11-08-21.

Read the written version here.

Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.



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October 31, 2021

Unplugged – Recorded Version

Filed under: John Morgan's Blog — John Morgan @ 7:02 pm

Here is the recorded version of the Grasshopper Note for the week of 11-01-21.

Read the written version here.

Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.



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October 24, 2021

What Isn’t Working? – Recorded Version

Filed under: John Morgan's Blog — John Morgan @ 10:27 am

Here is the recorded version of the Grasshopper Note for the week of 10-25-21.

Read the written version here.

Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.



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October 20, 2021

Adult And Immature

Filed under: Uncategorized — John Morgan @ 5:43 am

Fire hazard g8e2bf4be7 1920The Grasshopper asked if you can be an “adult” and be immature at the same time. My experience informs my answer, and it’s “Yes.”

For example, a friend immediately comes to mind. She is by all measurements a responsible adult. She also has a giant polarity response. That means if you say “black,” she’ll say, “white.”

One of the biggest signs of immaturity in an adult is a well developed polarity response. She ticks that box.

Another sign of immaturity is the lack of ability to be counted on. The person I have in mind seemingly has all the hallmarks of adulthood: takes care of his family, does his job well, gives to charity, and loves his dog. But when push comes to shove, you can’t count on him to pick up a shovel. He may agree to help out, but, almost always, you can count him out.

Three more traits that round out my Top 5 signs of immaturity are:

1. Failure to take responsibility.
2. Failure to apologize.
3. Upset with everyone.

If you’d like to read more about these 5 signs, start reading on page 144 in my free ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change. You can read it online or download at https://grasshoppernotes.com

Most of my readers are adults, but most of us have some percentage of immaturity. That’s a reality. The good news is we can grow up a little bit more by addressing our little corner of an immature world.

That means to recognize the part we play when our immaturity is on display. Start noticing if you deny responsibility, or have “Fonzie’s” inability to apologize, or tar everyone with your ire instead of the just the person who caused your belly to be on fire.

When you notice your immaturity about to come out to play, interrupt that behavior and be an “adult for a day.”

The more often you notice and interrupt, the less often you’ll be denied a seat at the adult table.

We can all benefit by growing up. We just have to stop drinking from an immature cup.

All the best,

John



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