The Grasshopper donned his travel agent’s hat and had this to say, “You can’t go in a new direction with old habits.”

A lot of us are attempting new beginnings coming out of a life changing time. Sadly, our transition will stall, and our backs will remain against the wall, if we let our old ways cast a pall, setting us up for an inevitable fall.

I’m reminded of the phrase the founder of NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) John Grinder said during my training in that people helping philosophy: “If you always do what you always did, you’ll always get what you always got.”

My pen couldn’t write fast enough so I asked him to repeat what he just said. It was an eye-opening moment for me and I hope it is for you too.

“Old habits,” in this context, are ones that haven’t worked for you but seemingly have become ingrained. If they remain in place, your bright future won’t last and your new direction will soon resemble your past.

Just the realization of this notion may be enough to set a new direction in motion.

Using computer terminology, we need to upgrade our operating system if we want to stop the crashes of the past.

We don’t need wholesale change, we just need to recognize and update what clearly isn’t working.

And we inherently know what it is we have to do. Our job is to go to work with more than a new outfit. We have to let this time of inflection, lead to internal reflection, and find a way to outgrow what’s preventing us from moving in a new direction.

I’ll leave it to you to use the method of change that works the best for you. My only mission here is for you to shine a spotlight on what isn’t working, and realize that a transition is futile if you don’t upgrade what’s in your kit and caboodle.

All the best,

John

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I’ve come to believe that there is a part of us that knows what’s in our best interest. Some have called it a conscience, others a guardian angel. But whatever the name, its existence is not in doubt, at least for me.

I’ve found that we can make requests of that part of us. We can make broad requests and receive specific answers.

For example, if you’re at a crossroads in life and you are not sure which way to go, it’s time to ask that part of you for some guidance. Your request could be as simple as, “Head me in a direction.” If you’re a religious person, think of it as a prayer. If you’re not the least bit religious, consider it an intention directed at the universe.

Then let the behind the scenes machinery do its work. Many are familiar with the Bible verse, “Ask and you shall receive, seek and you shall find, knock and the door will be open to you.” Let’s modernize that teaching and call it “3 Steps to Success.”

To me, the foundational step in finding answers is asking. And asking the right person increases your chances for fulfillment. The right person in this case is the part of you that knows which way to go.

Make your requests on a daily basis and then just go about your business. It’s my experience that answers will come to you, maybe not right away, but come they will, seemingly, from out of the blue.

You’ll succeed more often by requesting more often. That means you have to ask to get the ball rolling. Get in the habit of requesting, not only of yourself, but of others as well.

Final thought: If I could head you in a direction, I would point you to the door that reads, “Ask More.”

All the best,

John

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Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.

Here is the recorded version of the Grasshopper Note for the week of 04-26-21.

Read the written version here.

Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.

Recently, The Grasshopper stuck this on me: “Labels describe your actions or habits, not your real identity.”

We gather so many labels during the course of life and if we examine them closely, we notice they describe a role we’ve adopted, not our raw ingredients.

If you pick up a jar of something new at the food store, the first thing you see is the label. Some people take the time read the ingredients before putting it in their cart, most don’t.

We let labels define us and, frankly, they do a poor job.

I recently had a friend refer to themselves as a loser. I was quick to point out that losing at something is an action; “loser” is a label.

Labels define and confine. I once heard that when you label something, you limit it to the confines of your description. I’m reminded of the words of the ancient Chinese sage Lao Tzu: “The name that can be named is not the enduring and unchanging name.”

Your labels will change over time but your core identity never changes. We are what’s left when all the labels have been peeled away. That unchangable esssence is our unlimited, creative force, something that can’t be reduced to a label.

But, if you’re stuck on labeling yourself, stick with this one: I am a force of creation! Then, you’ll only be limited by your imagination.

All the best,

John

Listen to the recorded version.

Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.

Here is the recorded version of the Grasshopper Note for the week of 04-19-21.

Read the written version here.

Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.

Personal change is a big business. It’s been part of my profession for over 40 years. But in that time, I’ve discovered something: People don’t change; they evolve.

This perspective came to me a number of years ago when I was chatting with a friend. He emphatically said, “People don’t change.” I took longer than usual to respond to his assertion and then I said, “I don’t think people change either, but they can evolve.”

But some people will never evolve. From birth to death, they’ll argue to stay the same until they run out of breath. You’ll instantly recognize these folks by this expression: “That’s just the way I am.” That’s your cue to save your breath.

You may have heard of a personality typing system known as the Enneagram. It lists 9 personality types and it’s a great tool for getting to know who you’re interacting with. I use it to get clues for which angle of approach to use when I attempt to enter a person’s model of the world so I can see things as they do.

Within each of the 9 enneagram personality types, there are 9 levels of development. They list them as “Healthy Levels,” “Average Levels,” and “Unhealthy Levels.” It’s a fascinating body of work that you can check out for yourself by going to their website: enneagraminstitute.com That’s e-n-n-e-a-g-r-a-m institute dot com.

I only mention the enneagram levels to point out that there are levels of evolvement within a personality type, adding validity to my notion that people don’t change, but they can evolve.

I guess my real message here is that it’s a fool’s errand to go looking for wholesale change with yourself or with another. That’s what I like to refer to as “eating a whole cow at once.” (For my vegan friends, substitute a bulk package of tofu for cow).

Use the 1 to 10 scale when attempting to evolve to another level. If you assess yourself at a 5 on a scale of 10, don’t make it your mission to “get to a 10 or bust.” Instead, noodle out a plan to get to a 6. That way, you’ll have a better chance of succeeding. Once you arrive at 6, put 7 in your sights and move up the ladder in increments. It’s a lot less stressful and you’ll be a lot more successful.

Final thought: When you have a personal dilemma to solve, don’t try and change everything, look for a way to evolve.

All the best,

John

Listen to the recorded version.

Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.

Here is the recorded version of the Grasshopper Note for the week of 04-12-21.

Read the written version here.

Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.

Sorry to report, there’s no making sense of the senseless. No matter how grandiose the excuse for senseless behavior, it’ll never be enough to curry favor with anyone with an ounce of sense.

Did you ever notice the news reports when a horrific crime’s been committed? After they give the victims’ names and the actions that caused their harm or death, you hear this line: “Police are looking for a motive.”

That means they’re looking for a reason and reasons are more plentiful than dandelions in spring, and just as useless. Let’s just call these reasons what they are: Senseless.

If police arrest a guy for robbing a liquor store, it’s usually not a senseless crime. He wanted money. That was his motive. But when we witness a crime whose impetus puts us in a quandary, we lose our mind searching for a motive. We just have to make sense of what happened. Even if we arrive at a reason most can agree on, what have we learned? A vague piece of information that doesn’t prevent senseless crimes from happening again.

Finding the motive doesn’t bring back the dead, it only gets us into the morass of a madman’s head.

I’m less interested in his motive and more interested in the means that can be dealt with. Did he use a gun, a knife, a baseball bat or a car to inflict harm? That gives us a piece of information we can work with, not endless pieces of an erratic mind.

Do you think it’s of any comfort to the victims families that the perpetrator was diagnosed as being fed from the wrong breast by his mother and that’s the “reason” he went off the rails? Does that motive help police or psychologists prevent similar, senseless crimes in the future? The answer is an emphatic “No!”

Spending so much time searching for why a senseless act was committed will take us to our wits end, but won’t prevent it from happening again.

I guess my real message here is not about crime, punishment or derangement. It’s more about focusing on how vs. why. One gives us factual data, the other is just pie in the sky.

Trying to make sense of the senseless will drive you crazy and the only motive you’ll come up with will be extremely hazy. “How” will move you forward, but not “why.” It’ll only take you backwards and give you endless reasons to cry.

All the best,

John

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Here is the recorded version of the Grasshopper Note for the week of 04-05-21.

Read the written version here.

Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.