GrasshopperNotes.com - Thoughts for inspired living


January 8, 2013

The Courage to be Present

Filed under: John Morgan's Blog — John Morgan @ 7:55 am

C349583 mI quoted legendary football coach, Vince Lombardi in my weekly Grasshopper Note last week. He said, “Fatigue makes cowards of us all.” I got to wondering about that last night as I was getting tired and ornery.

It seems that being tired brings out less than useful patterns for me. I find the glass less full as I lose the courage to stay present. If I’m in conversation, I go into my head and come out with some outdated, conditioned retorts – ones that don’t work in the light of day.

The best thing for me at that tired point is to end the conversation and go off to sleep because I’m really not fit company. But suppose I had to remain in the conversation for some reason, the ally I would need is presence.

Sometimes we all get tired and irritable. It’s often when some of the worst things our mind can create will come out. Sometimes it’s entertaining; most often, though, it contains an edge. If you get the gift of awareness as you’re about to enter your fit of pique, you can summon your ability to stay present. That means to observe your response before it leaves your lips. That way you can preview it and select another response that contains more presence.

It takes courage to stay present in challenging times, but it’s the ally that will keep you out of harm’s way. It seems counter-intuitive to say that when you are tired and have to remain engaged, that the best solution is to wake up. Wake up to your ability to be present.

I can tell you from experience that it’s not easy, but it is rewarding. Do the arithmetic. How many times have you said something harmful when you were tired or ill? Being present will prevent you from, once again, letting your guts spill.

The courage to be present in the face of fatigue will save you countless hours of fence mending and let you sleep with a clear conscious.

All the best,

John

LOSE WEIGHT & KEEP IT OFF

 

STOP SMOKING FOREVER

 

SLEEP ALL NIGHT

 

IMPROVE YOUR SELF IMAGE

 

ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING

 

RELAX IN 2 MINUTES
I LOVE MY BODY

 

FOREVER YOUNG

 

HYPNOSIS FOR GOLF MASTERY

 

VIRTUAL MASSAGE

 

HYPNOSIS FOR DOGS

 

CALM & COLLECTED

 



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January 4, 2013

Actions Lead

Filed under: John Morgan's Blog — John Morgan @ 7:29 am

C559773 mOut walking Snuffy the Black Nosed Beagle in the freezing cold yesterday, The Grasshopper lifted one of my earmuffs and had this to say: “Actions lead, reasons follow.”

I guess I was thinking about the hundreds of emails I get at this time of year from potential clients that set themselves up for failure even before they begin a new endeavor.

Their emails contain all the reasons they can’t do something, and human nature being what it is, it rarely dawns on us that our reasons are our roadblocks.

As I started to thaw after the walk, I was again reminded of what my 4th grade teacher, Miss Wagner told us countless times, “You can either have what you want or your reasons why not.”

Our mind can reason away anything, no matter how absurd. You cannot, however, reason away action. It is, if you will, a separate action. The way the mind works is that we act and then we reason. It seems like it’s the other way around until you investigate. “The reason I bought the new car is because if I waited too much longer, I wouldn’t get top dollar for my trade.” Sounds reasonable, eh?

When you go behind the curtain, you will find that the decision was made by an, oftentimes, emotional part of you and you just added a reason after you acted on the purchase.

There is a technique in sales, where after the client has verbally agreed to buy, that you give them an objection to going through with the sale. I know it sounds counterintuitive but let me flesh out the technique. It is best used when the client has to explain the purchase to someone else in the company, perhaps a higher-up or partner.

Lets pretend that you sell widgets in red, white and blue and the client expresses a preference for blue. It so happens that your supplier has run out of blue widgets, so you offer the client red instead. He hesitates but finally agrees to purchase the red ones. It’s at this point you ask something like, “What’s going to happen when you tell your boss that you wanted blue and we only have red at this time?” He or she will say something like, “let me worry about that.”

You have started up their reasoning machine and they will protect their reasoning more ferociously than a mama bear protects her cubs. They will sell it up the line. That’s an upside of reasoning.

So how does this apply to making any change you want to your lifestyle? You have to stop insuring your failure by giving yourself reasons. “I really want to stop smoking but my husband will still be smoking and being around him will be a constant temptation.” That reasoning gives you an excuse to fail. Your reasons become your excuses that you’re already lining up to defend your failure.

List all your reasons for not doing something and then remove them one by one from your list and you will have a greater chance at success.

I understand the reality that if you want to be a world class ballerina and you’re over 60, it’s unreasonable. But you would be surprised at how many cockamamie reasons we come up with to insure our failure.

Let the reasoning machine have its say and then start whittling them away. Then your action will have a much better chance of leading you to a new way.

All the best,

John

LOSE WEIGHT & KEEP IT OFF

STOP SMOKING FOREVER

SLEEP ALL NIGHT

IMPROVE YOUR SELF IMAGE

ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING

RELAX IN 2 MINUTES


I LOVE MY BODY

FOREVER YOUNG

HYPNOSIS FOR GOLF MASTERY

VIRTUAL MASSAGE

HYPNOSIS FOR DOGS

CALM & COLLECTED



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