During a conversation with my friend Hali the other day I was describing some silly things I do to challenge myself during the course of the day.

For example, I have Keurig® machine in my kitchen to heat water for tea. I put my cup in place to catch the water, push the button to heat the water, and while that process is happening, I go across the room to where my tea bags are stored. Each one of the bags is individually wrapped, so I have to unwrap it and come back across the room to put it in the cup. The challenge is to get the tea bag unwrapped and into the cup before the first drop of water falls. I told you it was silly.

I described this and other frivolous rituals I do as “contests” and claimed that by doing them on a regular basis, they trained me to act more quickly in other areas of life. We can debate if my theory is valid or not, but that’s not the road my friend went down.

She said she does similar challenges but calls them “games.”

It struck me that there is an air of seriousness around the word “contest” vs. the fun that is connoted by the word “games.” The discovery for me was that I wasn’t enjoying my contests as much as she was enjoying her games. She was taking pleasure in her endeavors and I was taxing myself by testing and measuring my skills.

The larger discovery for me is how we approach situations in life and how that approach affects our state of mind and mood.

I could be having more fun during my day rather than having them populated by tension filled rituals that I succeed or fail at.

Our conversation brought to mind the popular axiom, “Don’t sweat the small stuff.”

The overarching message for me and, perhaps, you is this: Be less serious in your approach to life (unless you’re a bomb defuser). Make it more fun and games rather than a contest that is a mental drain.

All the best,

John

Listen to the recorded version below.

Who am I beneath the bumper sticker? That’s the question we start asking ourselves when we reach the subtraction phase of life.

Subtraction begins when addition ends. That means that we finally figure out that we don’t need to add anything else to discover who we are beneath our labels.

Addition is us looking to add that one more thing that’s going to make us complete. Subtraction is discovering the completed original beneath the painting we’ve been adding to our entire lives.

Addition is staying stuck on the surface. Subtraction takes us deep into our cavern of creativity. That’s when we discover who we are beneath the bumper sticker.

I’m forever grateful to author Byron Katie who asks us, “Who are you without your story?” She opened my eyes to the world of subtraction which added a whole new perspective on who I am beneath my additions.

I believe life is a trip out and a trip back. The trip out is filled with adding all sorts of things: an identity, preferences, prejudices, positions, and host of different roles to play: butcher, baker, candlestick maker. We get lost in these additions and can’t see the forest for the trees.

Then, at some point, we get an invitation from out of the blue to turn the corner and return to our essence – the completeness we were born with. If we accept that invitation, we begin subtracting our bumper stickers one by one and realize, beneath it all, we are already everything under the sun.

I encourage you to revisit the basic math of life and find out what phase you’re in and decide if you need to add any more, or should you head on down to the bottom floor and open the door to subtraction.

Here’s the bumper sticker: Subtraction Adds Fullness To Life.

All the best,

John

Hear the recorded version below.

Here is the recorded version of the Grasshopper Note for the week of 02-07-22.

Read the written version here.

Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.

Here’s a suggestion for a powerful way to start your day.

Begin your day with these three words, followed by whatever it is that you want to accomplish. The three words are: “I wonder how . . .”

“Wonder”, itself, is a magic word. Did you ever notice that when it’s used, you wonder along with whomever is using it, even if that person is you?

“I wonder who will win the Super Bowl.”

“I wonder what the weather will be like over the weekend.”

“I wonder how I’m going to make some extra money.”

“Wonder” engages your curiosity and creativity. When you add the word “How” to the mix, you not only prime your creative self, you kick your logical, planning self into gear.

This is not a strategy designed for instant results. It’s a practice, that when used regularly, builds on itself, while a plan fro get what you want forms in the background.

You can use this “I wonder how” strategy any time of day. In fact, using it multiple times during the day or night reinforces your desire to the parts of you that can make it happen.

You can write these words on cards and put them in multiple places as reminders to “wonder how.” You can put one on your night stand, your bathroom mirror, the dashboard of your car, or put a sticky note on your computer, or record an audio reminder alarm on your phone.

The key to success with this strategy is to reinforce it so it becomes second nature for you to wonder how.

This strategy doesn’t work because I say it does. It works when you work at it, and then you can validate the results yourself.

Final thought: I wonder how soon you’ll start your day the “I wonder how” way.

All the best,

John

Hear the recorded version below.

What makes someone the greatest? The answer is simple: being great when it counts.

There are many people who are great at what they do. What sets one apart from all the other great people in their category is their ability to produce when their odds for success are reduced.

I worship at the altar of consistency and what I find with people deemed to be the greatest is their demonstrated consistency. You can count on them being consistently great.

Yes, it goes without saying that even the greatest have an off day and don’t display the consistency that makes them the best. But it’s the rare exception rather than the rule.

So, if you aspire to be great at what you do and want people to know they can count on you, go to work on your consistency. Make it your greatest asset.

All the best,

John

Hear the recorded version below.

Here is the recorded version of the Grasshopper Note for the week of 01-31-22.

Read the written version here.

Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.

The Grasshopper joined me on my swim this morning and opined this: “Common courtesy has become uncommon.”

Maybe it’s just me but I’ve been noticing a lot less courtesy in everyday life. It seems to be everywhere: on the highway, at the grocery store, at shopping centers, restaurants, not to mention on mass transportation and on airplanes.

Yesterday, I witnessed two different cars get cut off in traffic at different times. Normally, what I witnessed in the past was people letting other people into the flow of traffic. Not now. That courtesy has left town and I’m not sure it’s ever coming back.

Also yesterday, I witnessed a man in the supermarket break out into a rant when he walked by the refrigerated orange juice section and noticed the selection was sparse. He directed his his high volume comment in an agitated and insulting tone to a store employee and said, “This shouldn’t be happening in America.”

I’m guessing the cause of peoples’ angst is being cooped up again due to pandemic protocols, but, hey, everybody’s in the same boat. It’s no excuse to leave your manners at home.

I guess the answer to this situation is the same advice we receive when we can’t change the world. That is: do your part and change your little corner of it.

Perhaps, we’ll soon discover that we’re all the common man or woman, and that common courtesy will make a triumphant return. I’m hoping that’s the case, but it’s nothing I’m betting on.

All the best,

John

Hear the recorded version below.

What used to be a parlor game is now a question you ask to have someone make tough choices by exercising their brain. That question starts with these words: “Would your rather . . . ?”

The practice can be for fun or it can be used as a reflective tool to see how serious you are in solving your problem.

So here’s my question: “Would you rather have a shoulder to cry on OR some actionable advice you can rely on?”

It’s my experience that most folks choose shoulder, and, by doing so, have their problem stick around for countless bouts of tears.

I recently had a friend reach out to me with a dilemma they were dealing with. I wasn’t the only person they sought out. Many before me had offered them a shoulder equipped with a crying towel. It was obvious that strategy wasn’t working.

I should point out that I’m not the person you call to simply vent. I’m more of the person you call for a hands-on strategy to get you out of cement.

Turns out this person wanted another person to regale with their lament rather than a time tested plan to solve their ailment.

She’s not alone. That’s why the Oprah Show was so popular. It was a daily cry fest about the wrongs being done to the throngs. It was incredibly successful in the ratings and a financial windfall for the host and her sponsors, but the shoulder seekers stayed broke.

Here’s some solid advice: telling your tale of woe forever and a day will continue your dismay. There comes a point where it’s in your best interest to say, “Here’s the action I’m going to take today,” and leave your ineffective sob story on the shoulder pads of yesterday.

All the best,

John

Hear the recorded version below.

Everyone has their illusion and it will probably remain for a lifetime unless . . .

Unless it runs into reality. Reality is stronger than a brick wall and it won’t buckle under pressure. It’s a mainstay in our lives and it assumes the role of “Bubble Buster in Chief.”

I’m under the illusion that Tom Brady will play football forever. The minute he retires, reality will destroy my illusion.

What illusion are you holding on to that reality will dismantle in a heartbeat?

One of the defining markers of an illusion is wanting something so desperately that we’re willing to look the other way when evidence to the contrary is on display.

Your illusion will burst. It’s only a question of when.

The less painful way to keep reality from upsetting your apple cart is to dismantle your illusion yourself.

It’s a 2 step process.

1. Recognize your illusion (you already know what it is).

2. Unravel it thread by thread so it’s no longer the whole cloth you’ve wrapped around your head.

Here’s an illusion many people have: waiting for someone to knock on their door with a solution to their situation. Chances are, that illusion has been in place a long time. Perhaps it’s time to recognize it as ridiculous instead of sublime.

Reminds me of a story I’ve told before . . . one of my teachers asked the class what we would do if the plane we were copiloting had it’s engine conk out and we were heading for the ground at 500 miles per hour. Countless answers were given and every one of them was met with this question: “What would you do if that didn’t work?” When we ran out of answers, he asked if we would like the correct answer. We all said an emphatic, “Yes!”

His answer was, “Do anything else.”

To prevent reality from crashing our illusion into the ground, we have to do “anything else” to dismantle it now.

Illusions keep us holding in place waiting for a fairy godmother to show her face and lead us to the land of milk and honey.

Here’s the reality: We have to take some action on our own to let the air out of our illusion that’s overblown, otherwise we’re a helpless passenger on an out of control drone.

All the best,

John

Hear the recorded version below.

Here is the recorded version of the Grasshopper Note for the week of 01-24-22.

Read the written version here.

Make sure to download a FREE copy of my ebook: INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change here.