Truth be told, I’m not fond of most men. I find myself more comfortable around women. It got me curious.

What is it about men I don’t like? Since I’m a man, it must be the same thing about me that I don’t like. I believe I found the answer.

I find that most men live in the world of assertion: a world where opinions masquerade as facts.

Assertions are like barbs and contain a fair amount of embedded anger. “I won’t buy a Japanese television because they’re not made in America.” If you dare look, most parts of any TV brand are made somewhere in Asia. Some may be assembled in America but the parts are not made here, yet many refer to it as an American TV brand. That’s an assertion.

Assertions are like rocks: Solid. Yet, in the atomic structure, all solid things contain a fair amount of space.

When I enter that space, I like me a lot more. When other people enter that space, I like them more.

Most people, men or women, rarely, if ever, enter that space. It’s noticing that space that allows you to recognize that your solid positions are porous.

“All Mexicans are left handed” is an absurd assertion but how many of us have equally absurd rocks that we throw at people.

To my fellow males, if you stop “telling it like it is” according to your self-written bible, you’ll see the wisdom of the request that Jesus made millennia ago: “He who is without sin, cast the first stone.” Notice he said “He.”

Before Jesus, we heard from the Buddha: “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” He could have easily changed the word “anger” to “assertion” and delivered the same message.

And finally let me quote Mother Teresa. “One of the greatest diseases is to be a nobody to anybody.” Want to remain a nobody? Just remain in the world of assertion. It’s a guaranteed way to keep people away.

All the best,

John