If there’s a more used word than “because” to defend our limitations, I’m unaware of it.

We divert attention away from a solution when we defend our or anyone else’s actions with “because.”

How often have you heard or said some form of this sentence: “I’m/He’s/She’s this way because . . .”?

“Because” will send you off into the land of illusion. If you put a period after the word “way,” you are now looking at the unfiltered reality and are better positioned to seek a solution.

Here’s my favorite: “He drinks too much because he’s an alcoholic.” What’s the real issue here? The answer is: “He drinks too much.” Notice the period after the sentence.

“My son is acting out because I’m having problems with my ex.” Begin to notice the trip to Never-Never Land that follows “because.”

“Because” keeps you focused on the reasons things are the way they are. You’ll never run out of reasons. If you don’t believe that, just ask a high school freshman why they’re failing Algebra. “Because all the kids are failing.” “Because the teacher doesn’t like me.” “Because our textbook is outdated.” The list could go on forever if you let it.

“Because” will not lead you to a solution. Reminds me of a story I may have told before . . . Back in my radio daze I had a DJ who worked for me who was not paying attention one day while on the air. There were a couple of occasions of “dead air.” That means the song he was playing was over and he didn’t notice the on-air silence because he was talking on the phone. Dead air has happened to every broadcaster in their career. It’s usually the rare exception. On this day, it happened twice in 10 minutes.

After his show was over, I invited him in for a chat. I said, “You had dead air twice in 10 minutes on your show today.” What he said next astounded and amused me at the same time. He told me that his doctor diagnosed him with ADD and that’s the reason he was having a problem concentrating.

I said, “Let me ask you a question off the topic. How are things going with your new girlfriend?” He said that everything was fine and, in fact, they had moved in together. I then asked, “This is none of my business but do you have any concentration issues when making love with her?” He laughed and said that everything was fine in that department.

I then told him that ADD wasn’t selective and he needed to pay more attention to his show. The instances of dead air immediately ceased.

Beware of the breadcrumb trail of “because.” It will lead you away from the issue that needs addressing and into the abyss of excuse.

All the best,

John