What are you married to? And, no, you don’t need a spouse to be married to something.

What did you go to the altar with? Is it working after all these years? Are you staying together for convenience, and how often do you come up with yet another excuse for staying together?

Perhaps you’ve come to the point where you want to alter that arranged marriage.

Being married to something means you are joined at the hip; you become one solid entity with a thing. By being married to a thing, you become more like a thing and less like a person. Like many married couples, you are viewed as one.

Who wants to be a thing? Not many, but most of us become just that when we exchange vows with a thing.

Do you want to remain a role in life? That’s remaining a thing. Do you want to be known as a position or a person?

When you answer the question, “Who are you?” and you answer as a thing, you know you are married to that concept.

“Candlestick Maker” may be a noble occupation but that’s not who you are. Neither are you a husband, a wife, mother, father, sister, brother, boss or employee. You may be married to those descriptions, but that’s not you. Neither are you your positions on a topic. You are far deeper than what you are married to.

Staying married to a concept makes you that concept and not the creative expression you were meant to be.

Altering your marriage begins by recognizing that you have become one with a concept – a thing. A trial separation is necessary to feel the freedom of what dropping that concept feels like.

In order to become your creative self, your positions have to soften, because positions harden you and turn you into a thing.

Find out what you are married to and you will begin to notice that you have exchanged your creativity for captivity.

If you’ve gone to the altar with something, it’s not too late to alter your position. Doing so frees you from concrete confines and takes you into the softer cement of creativity.

All the best,

John

JOHN MORGAN COACHING

LOSE WEIGHT & KEEP IT OFF

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VIRTUAL MASSAGE

The Grasshopper popped in on a phone call yesterday and had this to say: “If you always need something to be happy, you’ll always be needy.”

It seems we pursue neediness more than we do happiness and it usually doesn’t have a happy ending.

There is a difference between need and desire and we often confuse the two. Needs are things you can’t live without – air, food, water, etc. Desires are things that we perceive would make our life better or more fulfilling or complete.

I’d rather be happy than not, but I recognize happiness as ephemeral. It comes and goes. It’s not a permanent state and it’s not a requisite need.

We fall into the trap that something will make us happy. Perhaps it will, for a time. Take the person who “needs” a new car to be happy. How long does that happiness last after the purchase? To the first oil change?

We’ve all done this fill-in-the-blank: “When I have _____________, then I’ll be happy.” This suggests that we need something to be happy. We don’t. Happiness will visit whether we get what fills in the blank or not. Its arrival is independent of the desired thing.

Neediness is a result of confusing desires and needs, and when we’re confused, we experience a lot less happiness.

Catch yourself saying, “I need _________.” Then immediately substitute the word “Desire” in “Need’s” place.

When you make a clear distinction between the two, you become less needy and experience more happiness.

All the best,

John

JOHN MORGAN COACHING

LOSE WEIGHT & KEEP IT OFF

STOP SMOKING FOREVER

ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING

I LOVE MY BODY

SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT

IMPROVE YOUR SELF IMAGE

RELAX IN 2 MINUTES

FEEL FOREVER YOUNG