Life’s “Secret Ingredient” is interruption. It takes us out of programmed mode and opens us up to something new.

We tend to treat most interruptions as annoyances when, in fact, they can be a portal to a new view and a new you.

Every now and again our dog, Snuffy will interrupt my “Busy and Important” work by plopping a rope on my lap. I want him to go away but he wants to play. He has interrupted me. When I take the bait and play tug-of-war with him, it’s always a fun experience and it always produces a laugh for me.

Would I schedule that interruption? No, I wouldn’t; but each time it happens, I end up with a pleasurable break I wouldn’t normally take.

Interrupting ourselves is the agent of change.

We run on programmed mode at least 95% of the time. I made that percentage up, but it feels right to me. That means we are on automatic pilot most of our lives and auto-pilot will only take us to the same place.

We are patterned creatures and our patterns are quite reliable, regardless if they serve us or not. When they don’t serve us well, interruption is our ticket out of hell.

Observing a pattern of behavior, while it’s happening, is what I call “noticing.” In order to outgrow a pattern, we have to notice it while it’s running. The next step is to interrupt the pattern in midstream. Just interrupt what you are doing while you are doing it.

This is the 2-Step process for change. If you truly want to change a behavior, you have to interrupt it each time you notice it while it’s running. Each interruption paves a way towards a more useful pattern. The key is repetition of the interruption.

I don’t know how it works; I only know that it does. It takes discipline to notice and it takes commitment to constantly interrupt.

If you are struggling with change, take the time to notice and interrupt. It works when you commit yourself to work at it.

If this 2-Step process has opened your eyes to a new way, I will happily take credit for interrupting your day.

All the best,

John

JOHN MORGAN COACHING

LOSE WEIGHT & KEEP IT OFF

STOP SMOKING FOREVER

ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING

I LOVE MY BODY

SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT

IMPROVE YOUR SELF IMAGE

RELAX IN 2 MINUTES

FEEL FOREVER YOUNG

The Grasshopper dropped a bombshell this morning: “You’re shortchanging your parents’ contribution to you if you only laud them for their good example.”

We hear comments like these all the time: “I got my sense of humor from my mother”; “I get my ability to be on time from my father.”

We don’t often credit them for their bad examples. I believe it’s one of the most overlooked contributions they gave us.

“My mother is so obstinate.” My father is such an opinionated windbag.” How can traits like these possibly benefit us?

There is certainly enough downside to these traits if we’ve incorporated them into our life without noticing. That means we are as oblivious to these undesired traits in ourselves as our parents are/were to them in themselves. That’s just a lack of noticing on our part.

It’s time to notice and praise your parents for their bad examples. If they didn’t show them to you, you may not have built such an aversion to them so as not to incorporate them into your life.

Reminds me of a story . . .

If you have any Irish heritage, this story will carry more weight. Years ago, I was hosting a “wine and cheese” function with a travel agent enticing people to come on a cruise we were advertising on a local radio station. The morning DJ from the station came to the event to give the main pitch as to why these folks should come along. This fellow was a well known radio personality and his surname was unmistakably Irish. He did his presentation and then fielded questions from the audience. One person asked, with their tongue in their cheek, how an Irishman could go through an entire wine and cheese night without having any wine. The question brought a big laugh from the group. His answer was sobering. He said, “My father drank enough for all of us.”

It’s a fact, some people had lousy parents. Here is a typical comment a therapist will hear from a client: “My father was such a womanizer and he tortured my mother with this behavior her entire life. He spent more time with his ‘skanks’ than he did with his children.” If the client is a man himself, he may not recognize how he came to become such a faithful spouse and devoted father.

There is an upside to our parents’ downside if we take the time to notice.

The downside can act as a catalyst for us developing more admirable traits.

There are no perfect parents. There never were and there never will be. That fact needn’t stand in the way of us recognizing how our parents’ good and bad qualities helped us form into the people we are.

If you have one of your mother’s annoying habits, it’s helpful to notice it in yourself so that you can outgrow it. It’s equally helpful to know how a parents’ shortcoming has become the stimulus for your evolvement.

“I never want to be an ungrounded dreamer like my father” is an uncredited gift that your dad gave you.

It’s easy to disparage our parents’ shortcomings. It’s a more inclusive view to notice that our upside is a direct result of their downside, and it’s another avenue to allow forgiveness to enter our hearts.

All the best,

John

JOHN MORGAN COACHING

LOSE WEIGHT & KEEP IT OFF

STOP SMOKING FOREVER

ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING

I LOVE MY BODY

SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT

IMPROVE YOUR SELF IMAGE

RELAX IN 2 MINUTES

FEEL FOREVER YOUNG

I’m not sure what motivation is. I’ve been called a motivator but I’m confused by that term as well.

It’s as though motivation is something you have to get. I don’t get that.

Sometimes motivation is described as getting people to do something you want them to do. Other times it’s described as getting them to do something they want or don’t want to do. I don’t think it’s either.

I don’t think motivation exists; I just think it’s a name we made up to make excuses for our inaction.

If you can’t get started on something, you may say, “I need motivation to begin.”

My sense is we need to act to begin, rather than wait for mythical motivation. Action is measurable behavior we can see instant results from.

Waiting for motivation always delays action.

Action is movement. You have to make a move in order to begin something. Waiting for motivation is a cover story for inaction.

Suppose you are a writer or a painter and you’re not “motivated” to write or paint. Pick up a pen or paintbrush and begin the action of writing or painting. That’s a start. Conversely, motivation is waiting to start.

Action begins a process, always has and always will.

The good news is it doesn’t take a big action to begin moving. That’s another myth we’ve bought into that keeps us waiting for motivation. In fact, big steps can be an impediment to action. When we consider what we have to do as a huge mountain to climb rather than taking one step towards the foothills, we often fail to act.

The next time you fall into the waiting for motivation trap, notice how inactive you are.

Inactivity is the culprit, not a lack of motivation.

Here is an acronym to refer to when you find yourself waiting for motivation:

S. Start believing in something that does exist – Action.

T. Take baby steps at first.

A. Action is salvation.

R. Repeat an action. It will save you from waiting for that which will not come.

T. Take motivation out of your vocabulary.

I’m not sure I’ve completely debunked motivation, but it’s a start.

All the best,

John

JOHN MORGAN COACHING

LOSE WEIGHT & KEEP IT OFF

STOP SMOKING FOREVER

ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING

I LOVE MY BODY

SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT

IMPROVE YOUR SELF IMAGE

RELAX IN 2 MINUTES

FEEL FOREVER YOUNG

VIRTUAL MASSAGE