Here is an observation from exactly 5 years ago:

The prevailing myth surrounding acceptance is that you can will it to happen. You can’t.

Acceptance has nothing to do with setting your mind and all to do with opening your heart.

I’ve likened acceptance to the Christian concept of Grace in the past. You can’t will Grace to come to you, only open yourself up to it being possible. The same is true for acceptance.

You can certainly give lip service and say you accept something, but that act of will doesn’t deliver the feeling of acceptance.

What does acceptance feel like? The same question has been asked about love over the centuries. It’s different for everyone, but everyone who experiences it knows it instantly.

If you are wrestling with the concept of acceptance in your mind, you are not experiencing acceptance. “I know I should accept this but I just can’t.” As The Grasshopper reminded us just a while ago, “Should is evidence that there is an argument going on in your mind.” Arguing and acceptance both begin with the letter “A” but that’s their only similarity.

If you are arguing for acceptance, you are arguing for your limitations. Truth be told, you don’t have the conscious ability to accept. Your consciousness can set the process in motion by being willing to experience acceptance should you encounter it, but that’s all you can do with your will.

Acceptance will come when it comes and not a moment sooner, no matter how much you attempt to will it to happen. Willingness is the softer side of will and when you employ it, you have a much better chance of acceptance responding to your invitation.

“I am willing to accept” is a more useful mantra than a declaration of will that states, “I will accept things as they come.” No you won’t; you’ll resist them, and anything you resist always takes longer to happen.

If you are struggling with acceptance, end the argument now. Just be willing to accept acceptance. Willingness is a lure; will is a cement wall.

Are you willing to give up arguing for something that can’t be argued for? When you are, you free yourself from The Acceptance Myth.

All the best,

John