Aging
The Grasshopper must have been feeling his oats when he left this on my mental doorstep yesterday: “If you define aging by comparison, you’ll feel old.”
I can tell you from experience that I was offended by all the “old” references when I turned 50. The “over-the-hill cards” to the “funny” aging references gave me a peek into the psyche of others and how they viewed aging. It never matched up with my ideas on the topic.
Aging is a process; “getting old” is a mental construct.
We age every day. It seems that “getting old” is a mindset that goes on steroids when we get into using comparison as barometer.
I can’t run as fast as I could when I was 20. That’s a fact. But when you compile all the comparative facts, you paint a picture that is opposite of Dorian Gray. That picture then serves as your dim light of possibility.
Rather than compare, just be where you are. When I’m just here doing whatever I’m doing, I’m not caught up in reflection on how much I’ve aged since then. When you get immersed in what you’re doing, the farthest thing from your mind is that you’re too old to be doing it.
I’m not going to dive off an 80 foot cliff like I did when I was 18, but I’m not going to avoid the diving board at the swimming pool either. I do what I do when I can do it and that is rewarding for me, instead of lamenting that I’m not what I used to be.
If you like Eddie Murphy, you’ll readily admit that he would probably not be as good as a stand-up comic as he used to be, but he’d still be funny. Other older comedians who attempt to recreate their old routines and put them on display appear old. Those that just do what they do now still have a following. Look at Jerry Seinfeld and his internet series “Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee.” He’s not recreating the Seinfeld Show; he’s just doing what he does now.
You can be trite and say “age is just a number” but it’s more than that; Aging is a mindset – one that’s built on comparison.
When you just do what you do and don’t take the time to compare it to what you used to do, you feel alive in the moment and that never gets old.
All the best,
John
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