When we determine that certain people have superior skills at something, we are comparing them to all the others who possess that skill and then we make a classification. “He’s the best rebounder of all time.” That makes sense. That person is deemed in a class all by themselves and that’s worth celebrating.

When we personally deem that we are in a class all by ourselves, we become separate and superior. You won’t be celebrating that because no one is coming to the party but you.

Separate = Superior. The more we consider ourselves separate and apart from others, the more superiority we will display. Reminds me of a story . . .

Years ago, I was talking with Jerry Stocking on the phone about an issue I was having. He invited me to come to one of his in-house courses. He thought it would be beneficial for me. It’s what he said next that captured my focus: “Come on down and experience the course with a group of your peers, of which you have none.”

There it was in a nutshell – self ascribed superiority keeping me separate and apart.

The more you entertain the notion of “me against them,” the less you will want to participate in the dance of life. That leaves you off the dance floor, alone in your own world, and subconsciously advertising to people that you’re too good for them.

I’m reminded of the Eckhart Tolle observation regarding people we say we have nothing in common with. He says, “Yes, you do have something in common” by pointing out that in “X” amount of years all of you will be rotting corpses.

The trick is to recognize that commonality before we die.

To separate ourselves from superior, we have to start including more and excluding less. It’s a process. My experience is it won’t happen overnight, but it will happen if you make the effort.

It starts by recognizing others as people just like you with hopes, dreams, fears and fancies. This makes them less “other” and more like you. The more you take time to focus on what you have in common, the less time you’ll have to feel separate and superior.

I love Jerry Stocking’s definition of love. He says that love is “Inclusion.” It follows then that the less inclusive you are, the less love you’ll feel. There is an abundance of love waiting for us all. We just have to separate ourselves from superior by beginning the process of inclusion.

All the best,

John