Firm Believers
Best as I can tell, we all have a firm belief in something. It’s the “firmness” of the belief that determines if we’ll grow or not.
For example, many folks have a firm belief in their religion. Few take the time to recognize that almost all members of any faith inherited that belief.
Rather than answering the “What’s your religion?” question like this: “My religion is ______________,” a more accurate answer would be, “My conditioning is (fill in the name of your religion).”
But this isn’t about religion; it’s about firmness and how our conditioning puts the “firm” in firmness.
Your level of firmness in a belief is the level to which you are stuck with that belief. This is quite helpful to know especially when we are arguing for a belief that has no evidence to support it. That would be most beliefs.
It’s my experience that highly conditioned firm believers, who lack evidence for their belief, are more likely to dig in their heels when contrary evidence is presented. The refusal to look at or entertain a countering fact indicates deep conditioning that leads them to firmly plant their foot in do-do again.
The question isn’t whether your belief is right; the question to ask is: “Is my belief working?”
“Right” leads to resistance. “Is my belief working?” leads to “Yes or No.”
Once you discover that a belief isn’t working for you, no matter how deeply conditioned it is, or how long you’ve held it, you naturally begin to let the air out of firmness.
It’s usually not a blowout; it’s more like a slow leak. Your level of openness to new ideas just sneaks up on you and you’re surprised at your ability to outgrow that which was so firm.
When this happens for me, it first arrives as a half smile with the attendant, self-deprecating thought: “How could I have been so stupid?”
Take the time to inspect your beliefs and find out which ones aren’t working for you. Just doing this little exercise is often enough to start the process of outgrowing a firm belief.
It’s the one time in your life that you’ll appreciate going from firm to pleasingly plump.
All the best,
John
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