I’m all for saying, “Yes” more often because it opens us up to more possibilities. I also say, “No” quite often, not because I’m adamant, but because I’m not yet sure if I would follow through on a “Yes.”

It’s been my experience that it’s easier to go from a No to a Yes than it is to go from a Yes to a No.

If you go from Yes to a No, the disappointment you deliver is palpable. Saying, “No” may also deliver disappointment but it seems the feeling doesn’t last as long.

I’m fond of the Werner Erhard quote: “The reason life doesn’t work is because people don’t keep their agreements.”

If I say, “Yes” to you, I plan to follow through. Sure, I’ve missed the boat a few times but, by and large, I keep my agreements. Please don’t think I’m setting myself up as a pillar of the community. I have enough flaws to fill a concert hall, but saying, “Yes” and not following through is not one of them.

I find that many people say, “Yes” just so they don’t hurt your feelings. What they don’t realize is the pain they ultimately deliver is far worse when they stiff you.

Here’s a suggestion: Say, “Yes” to life more often than you do, but consider saying, “No” a little more frequently too, especially if you have a history of not following through.

All the best,

John