The Grasshopper offered a perspective on compromise: “Real compromise is seeing how far we can walk together without violating our principles.”

Compromise, depending on its form, can make you want to wash or wish you never compromised in the first place.

Some folks have compromise categorized as a loss. They rarely see the gain that can come about by compromising.

The art of compromising requires a willingness to be the person on the other end of the bargaining table for a moment. Walk a mile in their “crocs,” so to speak.

Find out what it’s like to be them and feel what it’s like to want what they want. You’re just trying their position on for size. There’s nothing written in stone that says you have to keep it, but if you experience it, you just may have more appreciation for it. That may help you walk a little further down the path together.

Differences are well demarcated. Commonality is much more fuzzy, until it’s explored. What interests do you have in common? Learn about those and walk as far as you can together on that path. Reminds me of a story . . .

I learned a useful technique from Tony Robbins years ago that helps people stretch what they think is possible. You stand up and take your right arm and hold it out in front of you, parallel to the ground. Now point the index finger of that hand forward. Now you turn your body as far as you can to the right without moving your feet. Note the spot your finger is pointing to. Now return to your initial position and close your eyes. You are now to imagine turning much, much further than you initially went. Once you’ve done that imagination exercise, you are to perform the turning exercise again. I’ve done this exercise at seminars with hundreds of people taking part and they were all amazed by how much farther they went without hurting themselves.

You can walk a lot further with someone without hurting yourself. It takes willingness and imagination and it won’t leave you in a “compromising” position.

All the best,

John