My dearly departed mother-in-law had a check list when conducting a dinner party at her home. It included this reminder: "Pickles, olives, nuts and mints."

We all want to make sure the party goes well and we bring our preconceived ideas with us. The difficulty with that strategy is that sameness develops over time and we contribute only to the dull side of the event.

How many gatherings have you been to where you can predict what someone's response is going to be when you hear a random statement or question being offered? How often is your answer insufferably the same?

You may benefit by a Dale Carnegie course to learn to spice up your conversation, but if you just bring your spicy self each time, people get used to it and you become not so hot.

The idea is to bring nothing with you to any interaction. Nothing is the gift that keeps on giving because there are infinite amounts of it.

Every something comes out of nothing. So if you want to contribute something to yourself and others, bring nothing.

The Grasshopper had this to say the other day:

Think of "nothing" as an infinite amount of fertile ground. Think of "something" as that which grows out of this fertility.

The human preoccupation is to hoard the somethings that come to us. The trouble is, when we hold on, we cram our limited space - our mind. When we jam pack our little corner of the world with our somethings, there's no room for anything new.

There may be some exquisite gifts on the other side of the door but our movement is so restricted that we can't open it. Preconception is the glue that holds the stagnation of something in place.

Spring cleaning is recommended year round.

Find all your preconceived notions - pat answers, judgements, how it really is, this is the only way, smarmy small talk, etc. and sweep them away. You'll have to do this house cleaning on a regular basis to keep this stagnant wisdom from coming back and taking up space.

Then it's a matter of trust. Trust that when you bring nothing with you, that you'll deliver the gifts that only presence of mind can bring. Bringing nothing takes practice and pays huge dividends.

Even if you don't speak, your gift of presence will be sensed by not only you, but others as well. When you calm down your part of the world, people around you notice and begin to share in your gifts.  Your peace of mind is derived by presence of mind - the presence to bring nothing with you, therefore having access to everything.

Letting go of what you know is the biggest contribution you can make to your growth. Others will grow in your presence - all because you decided to bring the gift of nothing.