All Problems Have Solutions But Not Unless You Notice Them - Grasshopper
Too much of our effort in finding solutions is misplaced which delays them even longer.
How often is an answer so blatantly obvious yet we ignore it through justification, denial or the energy robber known as resistance?
OBVIOUS SOLUTIONS
Stop spending more money than you make.
Stop thinking it will fix itself
Stop Drinking.
Stop (fill in the blank)
The solution is clear - you have to start before you stop.
The answer is simple yet the problem continues. There is so much time spent on plans for getting out of something, when the real solution is getting in to something. Reminds me of a story . . .
I worked with an IT guy (computer geek) in Boston whom I asked to fix a connector on my computer which was intermittent. I clocked him. He spoke non-stop for 17 minutes telling me how busy his department was and that I would have to tough it out a couple of days and he would get to it. When he was done stating his case, I casually asked him how long he thought the job would take. He said, "Under 10 minutes." I pointed out the obvious to him that he took longer to justify why he couldn't do it than to use the time to fix my problem. I got my connector.
Lest you think I'm a shill for Nike's motto, Just Do It, I know it goes deeper than that.
Noticing is the first step to the next step. You've got to notice that you are denying reality, or justifying behavior that isn't working, or resisting what is, before you can even take the next step.
It's easy for others to notice. It's easy for you too but you have to clear the fog first. The fog lifts when you start noticing, on your own, that you're resisting, denying or justifying. Personal honesty is a rarely used starter strategy because the other ones are so convenient, and always delay a solution.
You may not like the labels that people frequently use for you when describing your behavior, but upon closer inspection, those labels are much more indicative of the truth than you trying to outfox the facts by pulling sheep's clothing over your eyes.
Maybe you've gotten the label "stubborn," "immature," "drunk," "dreamer" or any number of other hurtful characterizations. If you stay stuck with the sting of the barb, you'll never get deeper with yourself than a flesh wound.
The stimulus of the often heard remark would serve you better if you bypassed your first response to it and went deeper for a solution than staying on the surface with prefabricated denial, justification or resistance. It's hard to agree that others have a point especially when it comes to our shortcomings. And it hurts.
Yet if you begin to notice the pat responses of denial, justification or resistance and let them go by without getting stuck in their emotional glue, you will arrive at a solution. If you want to defend your defenseless position again, you already know the outcome of that story - you stay stuck.
The whole world may be against you for good reason. It may be that you need all that grist to grind down your stony response until it becomes a polished mirror that you can look into and discover a solution.
As Humphrey Bogart said in Casablanca,
All the best,
John
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