A Mistake is Renaming a Part of Reality We Don’t Like - Grasshopper
We truly make a mistake when we deny the outcome of reality by saying, "It shouldn't have happened."
I've never been a huge Sigmund Freud fan but I'm warming up to one of his sayings: "There are no accidents." Reminds me of a story . . .
Comedian, George Carlin, who recently passed away, said way back in the 1970s that when two cars hit each other, it was a crash not an accident. Interestingly enough, it wasn't until the late 90's that radio and TV station traffic reporters started calling them crashes instead of accidents.
It's reality based language that is more accurate and descriptive.
Reality happens and then we have our occluded reaction. If it's something we didn't want, we label it a mistake. We add to this denial of reality when we add something like, "God would have never wanted this to happen."
The truth is it did happen. God wasn't taking a nap.
Reality, like whatever you call God, is everywhere. Is it possible then that God has an alter ego like Superman's Clark Kent?
With that in mind, I thought about starting a church called THE HOLY REALITY. But upon further inspection, it wouldn't have attracted many members, so the collection basket couldn't have supported it. That was a preventable mistake.
Some realities are not preventable. The guilt associated with, "if I had done such and such, this would have never happened" may sharpen your focus for the next time you're faced with similar circumstances, but it can do nothing to change the current reality. That's your ego playing God - the same God you are looking to for absolution for your "mistake."
The reality is you will have to pay for your preventable and unpreventable mistakes. That doesn't seem "fair" - another word that has nothing to do with reality.
"Mistake" is a word that keeps us focused on the mud we are stuck in. Recognizing Reality is the quickest way out.
Reality is truly God because, like its alter ego, it uses economy. Look at the realities we call "Acts of God." A lightning strike is quick, an earthquake comes and goes fast, tornados have a short shelf life, blizzards dump a lot of snow in a little time, and hurricanes can only sustain their high winds for an abbreviated period.
Reality happens in the blink of an eye and we want to take a Rip Van Winkle nap to explain it away.
The ego doesn't use the economy of God. This reactive part of us takes a long drawn out approach that keeps us mired in mistakes. The telltale sign that you are not dealing with reality and delaying a solution is the use of the words, "Should" and "Shouldn't" and the granddaddy of them all, "Mistake."
Reality is not a mistake. It just is.
If you are using the term "mistake" to cover your ass, you may as well join the nudist colony. "It was a mistake to have sex with that underage boy," said the accused clergyman. No, it was a reality that you have renamed to avoid retribution.
If we are using "mistake" to explain away a personal tragedy or unpleasant reality, we stay steeped in misery longer than is healthy or necessary. This is not a stoic suggestion to avoid anything from disappointment to grief. That would be denying reality. It's more of a roadmap to follow as you move through your attendant emotions so you don't drown in drama.
Whether they are preventable or not, there are no mistakes, only reality.
When we get clear on this concept, life takes us down fewer diversionary side roads that lead us to nowhere.
The only use of the word "should" that I've come across that doesn't seem to be a mistake is in the Buddha's observation of reality - "Everything is as it should be."
All the best,
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