Pick One: Be Right or Be Happy - Grasshopper
Lots of us have an investment in being right. I just wonder if we ever did the arithmetic on how much happiness it costs us.
There is an old axiom in product sales: Price/Quality/Speed. You can only have two.
- If you want price and speed, quality will be sacrificed.
- If you choose price and quality, it will take a bit longer.
- If you want quality and speed, you will pay a hefty price.
My experience is we pay a hefty price for being right. I’m certain there are times when we are both right and happy, but I’m just as certain those times are as rare as “Steak Tartare.”
So, basically, if you want one, you have to give up the other. So what do you want? Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy? You can’t have both.
It may surprise you that many people cling to being right even when faced with the reality that they can’t have both. Somehow, they think they are special and that reality will give them a pass and allow them to have both. They suffer.
“But I’m right,” you argue. That argument will continue for a lifetime with little happiness in between.
Six years ago The Grasshopper reminded me, “Some people would rather be right than happy. And preferring to be right, they are left out.” It remains truer now than ever before. There is a lot of heel digging going on and happiness has turned on its heel and left town.
The price of happiness is giving up being right. I, like you, have numerous Facebook friends who post the “right” thing constantly. Sadly, they aren’t very happy people. Some of my most unhappy times had me being right more often than not.
I’m not suggesting that you give up your point of view; I’m suggesting that you needn’t be so right about it. How many arguments have you had about being right? Years later, you may forget the content of the argument but you won’t forget how right you were.
Right is a repellent. My mother used a great phrase when she was at odds with someone and knew that it wasn’t going anywhere. She would end being right by saying, “I guess that’s why they make chocolate and vanilla.”
Are you willing to sacrifice being right to become happier? There is no right or wrong answer, only consequences.
All the best,
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