What’s Getting In The Way of Presence? - Grasshopper

You’ve probably heard the word presence tossed around a lot lately. It’s the go-to advice in therapy sessions, self-help books, podcasts–everywhere. Presence is like the magic remedy for a noisy, overwhelmed mind. Call it an elixir–a troubled mind fixer.

But here’s the thing: while it sounds great in theory, actually being present? That’s a whole different story.

Most of us only touch it for brief moments–maybe during a quiet walk, or a rare moment when life slows down. But then poof–it’s gone. So what’s blocking us?

One big culprit? We spend way too much time living in the past.

Author Eckhart Tolle said it best: “The past perpetuates itself through lack of presence.”

Sure, a little trip down memory lane can be sweet. But when you start living there, you're not just reminiscing–you’re moving in, unpacking boxes, and wondering why you feel so damn stuck.

Here’s the truth that takes most of us way too long to learn: the past doesn’t exist anymore. I know, sounds obvious. But think about how often we treat it like it does.

Those “If only…” or “I should’ve…” thoughts? That’s your mind booking a round-trip ticket to a place that’s not real anymore. And while you're stuck back there, the present moment–where life actually happens–is passing you by.

You “wallow in want” when you perpetually pursue the past, and prevent yourself from experiencing what the doctor ordered: Presence.

Being present means showing up right now–not being mentally MIA.

Just the other day, a friend was venting about a rough stretch he went through. He was deep in it–his body was tense, his face was tight, and I could see he was re-living all the stress like it was happening again in real time.

When he paused, I asked, “Hey, is any of that happening right now?”
He looked at me . . . paused . . . and then cracked a smile. That tiny moment? That was presence. That was the shift.

Presence isn’t some mystical thing you have to meditate in a cave to find. It’s just this simple realization: Now isn’t then.

And the good news? You don’t need a time machine or a guru. Just a little awareness–and a willingness to come back to where you actually are.