The ‘Is’ Or ‘Isn’t’ Of Reality - Grasshopper
Reality is comprised of two things, and two things only: Is or Isn’t.
We want to water down reality with reasons but reality doesn’t live in the world of reason. Reality is black and white and there’s no grey area.
Unless you have a dimmer on it, a light switch has two positions: on and off. There are only two options: Is or Isn’t. The light is on or it isn’t.
I wrote a piece years ago about one of the many words that tries to sidestep reality. That word was “deserve.” Here’s what I wrote.
“Let’s say that you want better treatment from someone. Declaring that you deserve it will never get it for you. In fact, deserve puts any necessary action on hold because it there’s no is or isn’t attached to the concept of deserve. Deserve keeps you in limbo between is and isn’t.
You can certainly get a group of people to agree with you that you deserve whatever you don’t have, but all the commiserating in the world won’t change “isn’t” to “is.”’
Asking for what we want is an action we don’t take often enough. We get caught up in the illusion of deserve which implies someone else should magically recognize our “deservedness,” and when they don’t, we stay silent and mumble our grumble.
On the other hand, the word “Earn” has more action associated with it; deserve has no action attached. There is a lot of “is” when you lay out the actions and accomplishments that support earn. “Deserve” sounds like a big pile of feathers that carries little weight and “isn’t” going to tip the scales in your favor.
There are plenty of verbs we use that contain no action, and we’re befuddled when no action is taken by others when we use them. In that cadre of impotent words are “hope,” “wish,” “try,” and too many others that don’t cut through reality.
So, here is my message: Start to notice and remove fluffy, lightweight, action less words from your vocabulary and you’ll earn the right to flip the switch from isn’t to is.
All the best,
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