Pontificating Or Relating? - Grasshopper
When I tell you what I know, I’m pontificating. When I pay attention to what I sense, I do more relating.
Relating to another human being requires having something in common. If your information is foreign to another, you’re not speaking their language.
Have the good sense to pay attention while interacting. You’ll sense the clues that indicate if you’re getting through, or not.
Most of us when we notice we’re not getting through, just start speaking louder. It’s better at that point to ask questions like: “I’m curious, what about what I just said makes sense to you?” That way, you’ll know if your message is hitting home or striking out.
Relating to another means joining their model of the world to see if it dovetails with yours. If it doesn’t, you would be well served by adjusting your angle of approach, and tailor your first-class message to reach the folks in coach.
Pontificating a message from “on high” may sound erudite, but it will have a hard time taking flight.
Paying attention pays dividends. It’ll keep you from blathering on past the point of no return, especially if relating to another is your main concern.
All the best,
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