What Chores Are Yours? - Grasshopper
Let’s face it, we all do things we don’t want to do, but we know they must be done. I have that under the broad category of “chore.”
But have you taken on chores that aren’t yours?
Again, I think we all have from time to time, but if it’s a full time undertaking, it’s a robber of your time. Sadly, this behavior becomes insidiously automatic over time and becomes second nature to us. And, even more sad, it’s now expected by others to continue.
The “others” in this case are the ones the chores rightfully belong to.
Picking up the slack is admirable and noble when another is down for the count, but when they return to an upright position, it’s time to make the transition, and return their chores to the proper owner.
If you do not, you’ve added to your life their lot.
What to do?
Address your feelings, not their shortcomings. If you go on the attack, you’ll be defeated before you begin. Better to describe your feelings. “I’m feeling exhausted doing all this laundry. I’m wondering if you can return to doing yours and take some of the pressure off me.”
That will land more softly than, “You slacker. You’re turning me into your slave by not resuming your chores.” Again, address your feelings, not their dereliction of duty.
Your parents brought you up right if you offer to help out in a pinch. But you’ll wind up going for miles if you give more than an inch.
All the best,
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