Rules That Need Bending - Grasshopper
Like most, I generally follow the rules, but I’ve discovered that pliability keeps me from downright breaking them.
“Hard and Fast” Rules are the ones to which I pay the most heed: “Measure twice, cut once” comes to mind. But as I grew older, “Step on a crack and break your mother’s back” fell to the bottom of the pack.
What rules have you inherited? That means you just absorbed them without your permission. You got them from your early care givers along the way, rules of which you had no say. Yet, you claim them as yours and, let’s face it, sometimes they get in the way. These are the rules to consider bending.
If there’s a 4-way stop sign in a one-horse town, I’m going to look both ways and then gallop through. Where I find my long-standing, absorbed rules getting in the way is when I insist others adopt them. They didn’t inherit them like me, and don’t need to be as rigidly compliant as I might be.
Yes, set your boundaries and let others know what your rules are, but before issuing that edict, consider which ones need to be retired. These would be the ones that reflect others’ values, not yours.
What rules are you following that lead to a dead end? Those are ones that would be useful to bend.
Like The Grasshopper reminded me years ago, the more pliable you are, the more agreements you reach. If you stay unbending, it’s almost as silly as bringing sand to the beach.
If I have one golden rule to share, this is it: Don’t insist others follow your your stiff, inherited rules or you’ll be considered what the British call, “a twit.”
All the best,
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