Nothing Grows in a Field That Won’t Yield - Grasshopper
Resistance keeps you like hardened soil where nothing grows making your crops barren and your field overrun with tumbleweeds.
Most people steel themselves when faced with an oncoming assault. They get rigid in anticipation of a blow. It's a conditioned reaction. A toddler has less chance of harm experiencing the same accident that befalls an unsuspecting adult. The child hasn't learned as much human resistance yet and its body isn't as tense and is more yielding to the circumstances.
Hardened of the body comes from a hardening of the mind.
Life's blows are not all physical. They come in all shapes and sizes and from all directions. Let's call them what they are - reality. The choice is always one or the other - yield or resist?
When you resist, you are always a victim. If you continue to resist, you develop a victim mindset and the calamities continue. "Why does this always happen to me?" is the often asked question. You DO have a black cloud over your head and you cause it every time when you continue to do your "pain dance."
Reminds me of a story . . . yesterday I ran into an old acquaintance at the supermarket. I hadn't seen her for awhile and asked how life was treating her. She launched into the two surgeries she had gone through and all the pain and suffering she had experienced. Then she went o to tell me about her husband who had been in and out of the hospital 16 times since the holidays and is on dialysis. I was empathetic to her situation and wouldn't wish it on anyone. I listened attentively and wished her well. We caught up again in the deli line and she continued her tale of grief.
Little does she realize how she keeps her dark cloud in place by the reiteration of her story. Every time she tells it, she hardens some more and leaves no fertile ground for something new to grow.
Pain, physical or emotional, continues when we own the following mindset - I'm in Pain and I shouldn't be. It's the "I shouldn't be" that is the resistance. As long as you own this belief system, you will have more than your share of suffering.
Some people who have developed the habit of resisting become constant victims of their conditioning. You can witness their ego harden to the point where they shut people out and wind up with no one. They resist and live alone in their misery.
It's interesting to note the diseases that occur in people who resist and harden - arthritis, high blood pressure, cancer, and Chron's Disease just to name a few. They usually develop these conditions earlier in life than you may expect. My father had all of them. He was always mad at somebody. He lived a life of resistance which took away from his enjoyment of life.
Yield is the traffic sign we should pay most attention to. To some a yield sign translates to "close your eyes and step on the gas." That usually has dire consequences. Yield means to notice the traffic that's around you and to do what's necessary to blend with the flow. Resisting is heading the wrong way down a one-way street and blaming someone else for your mishaps. You become bruised and battered and so do those who encounter you.
Yielding is acceptance of the current set of circumstances. You really have no other choice that works. Resisting always hardens you and causes more pain. Accepting softens your soil allowing a fertile idea to grow. Acceptance isn't resignation. Resignation is more mind hardening internal chit-chat about you and your misfortune. Acceptance is to recognize reality and not deny it or muster a war against its existence.
I like the expression "cooperating with reality." Reality is going to do what it does whether we like it or not. Resisting it is pure pain that has no gain. Cooperating with reality is yielding to oncoming traffic rather than cursing or bemoaning it. When you are observant of the traffic flow, you are more likely to see the opening where you can blend in. Honking your horn and ranting and raving will blind you to your natural opportunity and keep you and all the people around you stuck.
Resist or yield? Only one grows a crop in the field.
All the best,
John
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