We swim upstream every time we make an effort to control or explain away reality. Life is chaos and our only chance for getting through it alive is to respond to that reality.

Controlling life is the same as controlling the next thought that automatically pops into our head. It’s an exercise in frustration. Better to recognize the thought or chaotic event for what it is - Reality.

Embracing the chaos of reality is recognizing that life happens and then we have a reaction to what happens. It’s how we react that determines how full or empty our life is.

We are the walking dead when we concoct reasons for reality. Those reasons are sugar highs that may get us through the moment, but a steady diet of them has our life decay away.

Explaining away life is not living; it’s suicide on the installment plan.

Embracing chaos begins when we recognize we have a choice to respond to life.

Most of us don’t practice responding because we are so rehearsed in knee-jerk reactions.

I’m not sure that we will ever outgrow all our reactions to life; I’m certain of this: If we don’t recognize our conditioned reactions, we are destined to repeat them for a lifetime.

What reactions are robbing you of life? There is a long list if you take the time to notice. There may be one or two reactions sitting on top of your list that need attention.

What automatic reactions cause you to become robotic rather than real?

The only real choice we have is to pick a response to chaos. If we don’t choose, that choice will always be made for us. The chaos of reality is happening every moment.

There is a big difference in the following two statements:

1.       Reality is happening.

2.       Reality is happening to me.

If you choose #2, your life will remain shitty.

“Reality is happening” is the only choice that opens a new door. When you reflexively add “to me” to reality, you personalize something that’s not personal and lock yourself in the dark, windowless basement of stagnation.

This is not a prescription to eradicate sadness or any other of life’s challenging moments; it’s an opportunity to recognize and embrace them. If you are constantly trying to get rid of something, you are reacting to life rather than responding.

Embracing the feelings of life rather than chasing or explaining them away, allows you to metabolize those sensations instead of keeping them around another day.

The John Lennon lyric from his song, “Beautiful Boy” shines a spotlight on the reality of the situation: “Life is what happens to you while you are busy making other plans.”

There is no planning for the chaos of life. We can only react or respond. If you react, you have no choice in the matter. When you learn to respond, it’s as though you have found life’s magic wand.

All the best,

John