Remove "Because" And Outgrow Your Behavior - Grasshopper
"I'm _______________ because of _______________" is the blueprint for delaying a solution.
"I'm a hopeless drunk because I'm the daughter of an alcoholic, brow beating mother." No, you're just a hopeless drunk.
Your only hope for recovery is to own your behavior.
Anytime you justify a behavior with "because," you stall a solution. We get so caught up in how we got here that we neglect to notice that we are here.
Getting from here to there begins with letting go of because.
They used it as a linking tool, linking one idea to another because they knew that's how it was already working negatively in a client's life. They would turn the tables by offering a suggestion and then use the word "because" followed with a justification for the initial suggestion.
For example, they would say something like, "and you feel more comfortable taking tests now because you deserve to reap the rewards of your diligent study."
The mind links behaviors with "because."
When we use "because" to explain away our behavior, we cement the cause with the behavior and it becomes a hardened brick in a wall we can't scale.
Please believe me when I say that everyone is tired of hearing your "because," and no one pays a higher price than you.
It may be entirely accurate that something caused your behavior. What we fail to notice is that "caused" is past tense. They or it aren't causing your behavior now, you are.
When you are ready to stop denying or passing the buck on your behavior and begin to own it, you have a leg up on most others who are caught in the "because" trap.
Building a bridge from where you are now to where you want to be begins with distancing yourself from because.
Because provides you with an excuse you believe you deserve. As long as you deserve the excuse, you're precluded from building that bridge.
Begin to notice your "because" and then put it on pause. The breathing room you create with that one little action allows you the space to create something new.
"And you'll find it easier to move forward because you deserve to make progress now."
All the best,
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