There is an old song whose title says it all, "I'm On The Outside Looking In." If you're judging, you remain detached from actual feelings and live in isolation with the mental constructs of right and wrong.

People do so many things to divorce themselves from their feelings and judging leads the pack. When we judge, we separate ourselves from the feeling of being alive.

Quoting English playwright W. Somerset Maugham:

"But the critic is there not to feel but judge. He must hold aloof from the contagion that has captured the group and keep his self-possession. He must not allow his heart to carry him away; his head must remain well screwed on his shoulders. He must take care not to become part of the audience. He is not there to play his part in the play, but to watch it from the outside. The result is that he does not see the play they see because he has not, as they have, acted in it."

People are afraid of their feelings as though they are foreign enemies. They are our feelings and not to embrace them keeps us in the mental sphere of living, which is always one step removed from real life - feeling.

You can't think your way through life. You have to feel your way through - otherwise you leave a sterile legacy that only has you feel one thing - that you've missed something - life itself.

Life is a feeling medium. We can philosophize about it all we want, but until we jump into it and feel it, life remains an arm's distance away. Reminds me of a story . . .

I had the good fortune to attend a function where radio advertising legend, Dick Orkin was presenting. Dick said that when he writes an ad for a client, he only wants one piece of information from them. He says, "Tell me how you want the listener to feel."

Judging and not feeling leaves us disconnected from life itself. If we live in our head, which makes up about 10% of our body, we ignore an overwhelming majority of our personal real estate - our body. The more you remain isolated in your head, the more your feeling sense atrophies.

It's easy to judge and harder to feel. That's why empathy is disappearing from society; because we take the path of least resistance. That path leads to a pseudo-life - one filled with the numbness of judgement, completely devoid of feeling which is the essence of life.

If you feel like life is passing you by, suspend your judgements for just a day and see if more life doesn't come your way.

All the best,

John