The Cheater - Grasshopper

A million years ago when I was a disc jockey I used to play a song by Bob Kuban and the In-Men called “The Cheater.” It just popped in my head this morning from out of nowhere. I always get curious when that happens, so I’m going to wonder aloud in this writing and see where it goes.

I’m from the school that everybody cheats; it's just a matter of degree. For example, I have it on good authority that Mother Teresa used to cheat at Solitaire. She would travel with a deck of cards and pull them out as a diversion when she felt overwhelmed by her work. It must be true; I read it on the Internet.

 

Seems the person we cheat most is our self. So the question becomes,
“What are we cheating ourselves out of?” After musing on that for a minute, it came to me loud and clear: We cheat ourselves out of fullness – the fullness of life.

 

My friend Jerry Stocking talks about the upside and downside of life. His basic premise is you can’t have one without the other and both must be embraced. I take that to mean in order for life to be truly full, we can’t deny either side or we are truly full of shit.

 

This doesn’t mean to dwell on the dark or keep the lights on all the time. I think it means, to fully feel our life, we have to give equal attention to its parts when they show up. Our bodies are factories of feelings, or better stated – sensations. We can’t ignore some and just pay attention to the ones we like. Doing that is what one of my teachers called RCV. He claimed it was a medical term: Rectal Canal Vision.

 

Your sensations are indicators of messages your body is sending you. Each one is saying, “pay attention to me.” To lead a fuller, richer life, I believe we have to give each sensation its due otherwise we spend a good part of our life in denial ignoring the ones we don’t want and run away from what’s “true.”

 

People who tell you that the goal is to be one way all the time are selling something. They, in fact, are cheating you out of fullness – the essence of life.

 

If you are attempting to spend all of your life on your preferred side of the equation, you cheat yourself out of real, and as a result, you forget how to feel. That is truly how we cheat ourselves out of the fullness of life.

 

The State of New Hampshire has this saying on their license plates: “Live free or die.” My suggestion for all of us is a bit longer: “Live fully or die a little each time you deny the urge to cry.”

 

All the best,