Change Happens When You Start Changing - Grasshopper

Assisting people in personal change has been my profession for nearly 40 years. Here’s an observation on the people who change and the ones who don’t:  Those that take the ball and run with it succeed; the ones who don’t, stay lost in hope. And as I’m quite fond of asking, “If you hope in one hand and spit in the other, which hand will fill up first?”

Change that is temporary is not change; it’s a Band-Aid on a severe gash. That wound will open again, soon.

 

My friend Paul says that people don’t change. I generally agree with his overall assessment, and add this to his assertion: They do evolve.

 

You start changing when you start evolving from where you are to where you want to be. Evolving is always forward motion. If you go backwards, you’re no longer changing.

 

If you can’t commit to permanence when it comes to change, you’re wasting your time trying. You’re lost in what I call the “Diet Myth.” People go on diets to lose weight. When the diet ends, the weight returns. Their commitment to a lifelong lifestyle of eating and drinking is absent and their dieting results are always temporary.

 

Here’s a barometer you can use to determine if you’re a candidate for change: Draw a horizontal line on a piece of paper. The line represents a scale from 1 to 100. On the left side of the line write the words “Nice to have.” On the right side of the line, write these words: “If I don’t get this, I won’t be able to breathe.”

 

Next, put a mark on that continuum to represent the percentage of commitment you are willing to make to change. If you’re not above 80%, don’t even attempt to change until you are at that level of commitment, because you’ll only be spinning your wheels.

 

Here are two of life's realities: No one can go to the bathroom for you and no one can change you; only you can do that. Change takes the personal realization that you need to permanently evolve in a new direction.

 

“Temporary” is the enemy of change. Until that reality is permanently etched in your mind, your only evolving will be revolving.

 

All the best,

John