If You're Married To A Philosophy, At Least Sleep In Separate Beds - Grasshopper
Everyone, stated or unstated, has a philosophy. It's our personal take on how thing are. Our most misguided move is when we turn a great date into a lousy marriage.
When I was married, my wife had an expression she used about teens and young adults. She said, "They're trying on new hats." It capsulizes how young people try many different things looking for a fit – something that feels comfortable.
They're formulating a philosophy. It seems at some point we find the one we like and then set it and forget it. That's when your heartaches begin.
Reminds me of a story . . .
My father was a bricklayer by trade. About 15 years ago he was visiting us and I asked him about the feasibility of a brick walkway from our driveway to the house. He thought it was a good idea but cautioned against using cement. Heresy!
My father preached bricks and mortar for so many years that I thought he had lost his faith when he suggested I have the brick walkway set in coarse sand.
He said that using cement to bond the bricks would make it harder to fix when the inevitable brick would become dislodged from all the foot traffic or from some accidental cause. A sand base beneath and between the bricks would make for an easier repair.
Who knew I was getting a lesson on philosophy?
When your philosophy is set in cement, you're inflexible to another approach that may work even better because you're too fixed in your position to even entertain the notion. You may have also recognized that ideology is the twin sibling of philosophy.
Just look at the inflexible ideology we see on parade everyday from our elected officials. Firm philosophy causes gridlock.
I'm not out to get anyone to change their philosophy. That just sets the stage for opposition and impasse.
My suggestion is to keep our philosophy flexible enough that we don't harden when we hear an opposing idea.
After all, it's the invasive sand that causes the oyster to produce a pearl. If they totally clammed up, they wouldn't create anything.
Philosophy set in stone keeps you between a rock and a hard place.
I hope I have peaked your curiosity about philosophy, enough so, that if you're married to one, that you don't become "Old Hat" or a stale mate.
All the best,
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